I think my thus far soul-crushingly boring summer has effectively squeezed out what little blogging wit I had left, which is why it’s been taking me so much longer to publish new posts.  I apologize for the delays if you were at all concerned (I bet you were :D That’s so kind of you!).

Bluh, I need a muse.

I hate fairs.  The fair is where all the ugly, sticky people take their cousins to smell bad and litter. There are two things to do at the fair: One is to wade through crowds of sweaty, overall-wearing hill people and pubescent teenagers to strap yourself into spinning death traps assembled a few hours earlier by high school dropouts and ex-cons, and the other is to wade through crowds of sweaty, overall-wearing hill people and pubescent teens to buy face-greasifying deep-fried crap. Fun.

You know those dreams you have when you’re half asleep, where it feels like there is a spider or something crawling on you and you freak out and jump out of your bed?  Well last night I successfully convinced myself it was just a dream, only to find that there was actually a spider crawling on me.

Crossing my fingers for spidey powers tomorrow morning.

Speaking of which, I am entirely sick of comic book movies, don’t get me wrong, I love a good super hero movie (Iron Man, Spiderman 1 & 2, Dark Knight), but I feel like there aren’t enough people out there who actually read comic books to warrant such excessive spandex on the big screen.  The movie industry needs to back off on the super hero stuff, it makes me feel decidedly un-super.

That reminds me, I’m in the process of writing a review of Super 8.  Although you’ve probably seen it by now if you were at all interested, which defeats the porpoise (lol) of a review.  So I may or may not actually finish it.

You know what I don’t understand? Caffeine free Diet Coke.  What’s the point of drinking it if it has no caffeine or sugar? Isn’t that what soda was invented for? Actually, it originally had cocaine in it, and you’re complaining about the caffeine and sugar?

Don’t you hate it when you’re doing the puzzles on the back of a cereal box and you accidentally read the answers? Why don’t they put them on the inside of the box or something, totally ruins the fun.

Then again, so does the fact that I’m not a small child.

Things not to do in the President’s office #17: Store your snackies right next to the panic button at the front desk…

So I’m currently working on my ability to un-see things, not much success so far.  The moral of the story is that some things should not appear on my news feed.

Has it been long enough to make jokes about Japan?

You know that feeling when it feels like you’ve forgotten something, but you can’t remember what? I live in a constant state of that feeling, and I’ve usually forgotten something.

No one ever responds to these requests, but if anyone has any suggestions for blog posts or things they’d like to see on here, PLEASE don’t hesitate to let me know, via facebook message, comment, or e-mail.